Thursday, October 24, 2013
Christmas! | Carole...
"It's very hurtful when friends and family move on with their lives and leave me behind…like a once loved and treasured teddy bear who is now stored away in an affectionate cupboard of their lives but no longer cared enough about to want to come and see"
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The first year I was on my own, I called everyone I could think of and they all had excuses why I couldn't join them on Christmas.
Due to delivery glitches, the mailed gifts from my aunt and my good friend didn't arrive on time, so I sat there on Christmas looking at a pile of gifts under the tree, things I'd painstakingly handmade or carefully shopped for ... for people who didn't give a damn that I was alone on Christmas. But not one single thing under the tree for me to open. And several of the people I had gifts for, when I mentioned it to them after the holidays, they were "too busy" to come fetch them and wanted me to spend more money mailing the gifts to them. It wasn't even worth coming to see me if they knew they were getting a gift in return.
The same thing the next year -- I again tried to wangle an invitation and no one wanted me, but at least this time I hadn't wasted the effort of getting presents for anyone. And will never again waste time getting presents for anyone until I actually have an invitation in hand for Christmas. If I'm not worth their time to spend Christmas with, then they're not worth my time in getting a present for them.